I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
my dad just said 'either you're lying about your plans tonight or you kids are really lame nowadays'. maybe we should nix the singles saturday slumber party and go to a bar.
You texted the wrong number but that's probably the best call you'll ever make.
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
I legitimately just tried to piss above my head. I got to my chest at highest. There's piss everywhere.
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
When you're looking for your panties tomorrow, you traded them for a blunt on the train.
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
Fuck off. Since when do you love him??
Since he licked my arm to retrieve the macaroni and cheese he dropped. You have to appreciate that
Can't even lie. Mad respect
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
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