she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
as soon as his mom opened the door to let me in the house she asked if i would like a shot
it's gonna be a great weekend
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
I'm gonna let my dick speak for itself from now on. Seriously, it's always recruiting for me even after 6 hours of drinking.
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
Did you seriously just hashtag my sex life as #yolo2013?
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
So are we just not going to talk about the time I came home to you jerking it in the kitchen?
Saw a girl on a walk of shame bend down and look in a pizza box by a trash can to see if there was still a slice left. That's when you know
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
I didn't even know his name until he texted me the next day and told me I should take a plan B pill. Thanks Danny.
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
Randomize
