I think i ate a live goldfish last night. that i caught with my hand in a kiddie pool. my stomach really hurts.
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
I heard porn and smelled bacon cooking. I knew you had to be home.
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
Just smoked out of an apple with Steve Jobs. I love Halloween.
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
Some old bald man is a 100,000 dollar Audi sports car just revved his engine at me and held out his phone at me trying to get my number. I hate the valley.
WE'RE NOT MAKING A DICK PIZZA OKAY
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
Everything is covered in gelatin and pam cooking spray. Jesus be a shield.
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
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