Do you think they could tell I was high on that conf call?
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
Like. There is beer on the other side of that door and 6 yards in. If he's not back in 20 minutes to let me in, I am using this tree as a battering ram.
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
Based off the amount of cat hair on my poncho....i stole a cat last night.
Some guy just rode an office chair down my street, I hope he comes back so I can give him my number.
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
I'm so bored I talked to the Bible guys for 30 minutes.
I offered them beer last time they came here bahaha
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
So apparently my bro is going to make me fix his tattoo this trip... He sent me a pic of said tattoo. Tattoo is of a sperm, on his penis, which was in a woman's mouth... Wth
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