brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
I think misery doesn't even think of me as company anymore. I'm an unofficial roommate.
Totally just locked myself outside of my house, in my robe, with the fedex man and a box of sex toys. Not my week.
I wish the ER had shaved that part of my head. It would be easier to show people my staples at the bar.
It's amazing how many friends she makes simply by carrying that flask of whiskey everywhere she goes.
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
I did too many shots and now a kitten is trying to eat my bagel.
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
Whiskey and tits go great with anything. Especially fire.
This hangover is too legit right now. I just sneezed and almost puked
Randomize
