i've been called drunk 4 times today and it's only 3pm
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
Left and drinking by a bar by myself. Everyone is in pajamas. I'm in a tuxedo. This is my life.
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
Also adulthood=replacing meals with bourbon. And not getting your hair caught in a fan.
Just saw some dude tumble down the stairs of the bar while leaving...fist pump...and then sprint down the road
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
I sharted in court today and had to sit on it for about three and a half hours.
Randomize
