Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
you called me at 4 am to tell me you found the cracker barrel location where we'll have lunch next week
My mom called me and we started arguing as usual. I finally screamed at her "I HEAR YOU AND THAT 30 YEAR OLD FUCKING!" and hung up. She hasn't called back yet. I win.
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
Today is a spill-drugs-all-over-myself kind of day.
My mom is currently drinking alone in our kitchen singing the Dixie Chicks to herself so, hey, alcohol is forever and we should not be shamed for its use.
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
I love Texas men! TSA agent found my vibrator, nodded approvingly, and said, “You have a nice night, ma’am” with a cowboy accent. I almost made out with him on the spot
“On a break” is implied when it’s a Russian chick dressed as Black Widow wearing Minnie Mouse ears
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