Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
Come to me. Jacob is confessing his love and all I want is a hot dog. With chili. Not love.
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
Yeah man... I ordered donuts, drank wine, and cried to a movie with Seth Rogen in it. Do you really think I have my shit together?
We were kinda loud so his roommate woke up and to make up for it he invited him to a threesome. I can't drink whiskey anymore.
Im legit just salty with everyone who has a penis right now
I offered to trade my cat for a bottle of tequila as long as it had a handle on it and realized I had a problem
My bookbag can hold 30+ beers. They shoulda put that on the tag bc its a big selling point
besides the unzipped fly, the black eye and the toilet paper on your shoe you looked really sexy today baby!
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