dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
i'm crying at olive garden. i've hit rock bottom
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
Oh my god. My pre-date bowl for nerves tuned into "I'm too high for this date" he kept talking about trucks and I couldn't stop making racial slurs.
That point of drunk where you're in a bar bathroom and you're like "F*ck you bra! I'm not taking your sh*t anymore! and you take it off and throw it in a trashcan.
He would have to make magical things happen in my nether regions to actually make me vote republican.
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
OMG I DIDNT READ THAT TEXT CAREFULLY CAUSE I'M ON THE DEVILS LETTUCE & I THREATENED TO PUNCH A CHILD OMG I'M SO SORRY
Randomize