doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
you will always have a special place in my vag
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
He just got home drunk. He ate 5 snack cakes, said Little Debbie's his bitch, went upstairs and fell asleep.
Dude it was a mini horse. It obviously only eats mini things.
by the time the kitchen caught on fire everyone was too drunk to be alarmed. the host just poured beer on it to put it out. how was yours?
Besides the flaccid incident, it was decent. Average sized. So this is my life now. Loneliness and lackluster sex.
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
I'm not sure what is worse, the fact that Hoffman doesn't sell vodka before 9am or that I was trying to buy vodka at 8:30am.
Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
He literally said from now on he's always banging chicks with asthma becuas it's such an ego booster
Randomize
