I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
are you looking for your table cloth? Cause I found it around my neck this morning...
where's my purse there's an important taco in it
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
I have to keep checking she's breathing. This is why we don't drink on Sundays
I'm buying you potatoes, the least you could do is not ask any fucking questions and just say thank you.
The chlamydia really affected his face.
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
Dude true life I died at the derby...I lost everyone I knew, went down a bourbon and mud slip and slide, lost my hat, fell off the roof of a porta potty, sprained my ankle and knee and then got arrested.
Came home to my roommate drinking a 40 in the shower. Chugging with his hair still fully shampoo'd.
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
I don't know why, but whenever I shave my balls I feel more aerodynamic.
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