Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
Just saw a squirrel crossing the road in a crosswalk..my morning has improved exponentially.
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
Now he's talking about how he's writing in a journal because he doesn't remember "his thought patterns when he was in elementary and that's distressing". I'm walking home. Fuck this.
i love that he's uncircumcised. it makes handjobs so much easier. it's the lazy susan of penises.
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
I can't. I will literally throw up my liver
Why dont you be an ebola patient for halloween? You can totally throw up and itll be part of your costume.
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
My ex-fiancee UPS-ed me a sixer of tall boys, and a fifth of bourbon for christmas, from halfway across the country. What does this mean?
Like who needs a job and family when you can get drunk for free with strippers?
burned my penis with a sauteed onion again.
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
I woke up in my basement holding someone else's underwear and a bottle of mouthwash . I wish I could explain more than that but i can't remember ...
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