Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
Tonight was like the Noah's Ark of alcohol. I had to have two of everything.
Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
I know I'm really high but I swear I just saw him beating off to his fantasy football roster.
By the grace of god and the ingenuity of Alexander Graham Bell, this text message is made possibe: YOU ARE A WHORE
i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
I've decided to tape numbers to the bottom of my heels corresponding to the number of drinks I can safely consume in them.
After a certain blood-alcohol level, the dog is in charge.
The stripper just invited me to take shots with him out at his car after he gets off stage.. I mean why not? I've already seen everything he's got and it'll be easy to get him naked.
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
The only way that night could have gotten any better would be if a unicorn would descend from the heavens with a nacho bell grande in a bag around its horn beat boxing Hakunah Matata.
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
Memeber that time you got detained in Poland. We don’t talk about that enough
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