youre lurking in front of me
Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
the russians are downstairs with the vodka loudly proclaiming happy birthday america. i don't care if it's the fourth, i care that it's 9 am and they woke me up.
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
Yeah I just gotta do it so that my major doesn't find out. Doesn't look good having a stripper teach your 3rd grader
My mom just looked at me while watching the fireworks and asked if it reminded me of how I felt after sex. I'm so uncomfortable.
The drunk mom in a firefighter hat just told her to leave.
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
i just called dibs on the taxi driver at the bar that isnt drinking. im a grown up
I'm eating Arby's in the bathtub because I'm an adult and I do what I want
Randomize
