:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
Ambien does the same to me. One time that I took it, I got this huge bowl of spaghetti out of the fridge and thought it was a castle and that the meatballs were little slaves. I ate all of them first and then the noodles were the soldiers and the sauce was the water in the moat. And when I finished, I fell up the stairs and threw it all up.
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
He asked me to touch his mustache. Should I go home with him?
He set 8 alarms to make sure I took my birth control on time..
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
Get this. Chipped my front tooth taking a sip of a gay mans beer out of my cleavage. Fuck my fucking life. that'll be fun to explain to my dentist
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
I'm spending tomorrow with her. What should my ridiculous personal goal be? I've already got a blowjob while eating a cupcake
That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
Im pretty sure breakfast wine is a thing, and if it isn't, I just invented it
Vacuum the place before you go out of town there are random glitter cocks everywhere
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
Randomize
