And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
Skinny jeans should not be made in size 14. Then, it's just a lie.
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
please don't let me die tonight
what have you done for me lately?
Just got a lapdance on the metro. She said she was on maternity leave and needed the practice.
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
You may see me wearing your shirt to class. It's because I still have the spins and I'm anticipating throwing up on it. Asshole.
I WAS JUST SITTING HERE BEING SNIFFED BY ODD WOMEN FOR A SOLID 5 MINUTES. My face was a twist of utter fear and confusion...
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
I started the day with dreams of getting laid and ended it with the reality of eating Taco Bell in my bed with my dog.
I lost my voice. So I'm going to pretend I'm Ariel with legs today.
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
There's wax on my nightstand, my sheets look like Christmas, and my vagina feels like it got into a fight. All signs of a good night
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