so... i had sex tonight
with a midget
nicccce tits for a little person
I just watched a guy get turned down by a prostitute
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
Note to self: You can't deep fry cheese-its.
There's a black statue of liberty dancing on the side of the road. Please hold while I join him.
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
You ruined a cute cat because your lack of horniness
Calm down I'm not kidnapping the bartender
so like
i may have gotten a little bit of blood in the charging port of my phone
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
Randomize
