I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
We made the bar tender tell us how he proposed to his girlfriend. In detail. While we made gushing noises. We are embarrassments to females everywhere
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
Oh, I never thought you were a dick. You were one of the best morally comprised ideas I've ever had.
How was my weekend? I just blew my nose and a gram of coke fell out. My weekend was fantastic.
Drunk at work, covered in Cheetos is no way to go through life.
I found Cheetos.
If I woke up in a pillar of smoke I suppose that's a sign right
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
For a second I thought I had fallen asleep on the floor and freaked out. Then I thought somehow I was on drugs. This is my life.
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
Look, I tried but his dick tasted like disappointment.
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
Randomize
