PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
Dude, totally just found out that I've been washing my hair with semen for the past 3 weeks.
I woke up at 5 this morning face down on my bed with gummy bears stuffed in my leggings. Yeah.
and i was just like oh shit i'm getting felt up by a 15 year old
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
I think Saturday night will always be a mystery to me, except for buying an excessive amount of birthday shots for everyone and yelling BIRTHDAY SHOTS before every shot.
He sent me a snapchat of himself growing a double chin. I think we're past the stage where there's any risk of us sleeping together. Ever.
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
Randomize
