To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
I can hear the condescending tone from the atm when it asks if $3 is all I would like to deposit
If you like her enough, bring her with. If not, eloquently cunt punt that bitch through the field goals of life.
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
I don't want to jinx anything but I may have found the one.
Cat or human?
Human
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
You should never be more than a quarter of a mile from a working toilet
Preach!
Btw I definitely had pizza sauce on my face, a painful hickey on my neck, and I just remember screaming SISTER WIVES because of the girl's 1997 jean skirt! Wow.
Accidentally mixed my gin with cold brew coffee instead of cranberry juice. It’s bad. But I’ll finish it. Never leave a fallen soldier.
Randomize
