hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
My mom assumed I was crying because he was leaving. Figured that was better than explaining my eye's sensitivity to semen..
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
What would you say if I got first degree burns on my nipples from drinking coffee topless?
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
We've completely outdone ourselves. We packaged a collective total of six grams of pot and salvia into little bowl-sized tinfoil capsules. It's totally impossible to tell which is which without comparing, every Friday from now on we pick one out and see what the fuck happens
I sexy timed too hard and there is an ass shaped piece of a ping pong table now missing bc of it. How am I allowed to leave the house without a helmet?
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
its like my accent is a device for a 100% chance of sex every time i leave the apartment. i love being english in this country.
Riddle me this: why did I wake up next to a stuffed sword fish?
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