that's the ideal party shoe. cute, but i can still puke in them.
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
so apparently I plead the 5th to every question they asked me when they put me under the conscious sedation to set my broken wrist
bars should really give you discounts for bringing your own shot glass
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
I'm not THAT invested in seeing you to an orgasm
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
You fell asleep while I was sucking your dick
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
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