My room smells like vodka and shame
just woke up. wallet empty. bottle empty. tattoo in pen on my arm. smell like bad sex. woke up alone. and wall-e is playing on my computer. need answers.
He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
Holy christ fuck what has my trainwreck of a life come to just blew a 17 year old so help me god
high enough to want to lick peanut butter off of Michael Buble's vocal chords as he serenades me.
Drinking gin at a party, riding a giant inflatable walrus all around the living room.
I complimented him on his choice of carpeting while he was humping me.
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
Someone the age of your son tried to go home with me from the bar last night
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
Yeah everywhere i go i feel like a 3rd or 5th or (2n+1)th wheel. That's right, i'm a mathematically depressed drunk.
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
Randomize