oh don't forget that when we go furniture shopping we have to find a matching bong so put more money in the furniture fund
I don't think he understands the importance of corndogs. Or condoms for that matter.
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
I made my own utility belt like Batman. It has a cup holder for my beer, cell phone holder, a little pocket for condoms, and a sewing kit just in case.
You burned the hair off your arms. Again.
It grows back stronger each time.
I wish university was like frosh week all the time and then they just give you a degree for surviving
All I know is that I woke up with glitter all over me and blood on my shoes. It wasn't my blood.
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
I don't think meeting his drug dealers counts as a relationship landmark.
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
I found a loose wire in my thermostat. Couldn't find the pliers, so I used a nipple clamp to fix it.
I bet you my entire life savings of $0 that there's a Doctor Who porn parody and that it features the sonic screwdriver being inserted into some cavities
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
Randomize
