Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
My mom just told me to drench my entire body in vodka for 20 minutes. I have never been this russian. no one has ever been this russian
Seriously. My exes act like they own shares of my vagina.
Well, in their defense, they have invested a lot of time and money
she's throwing a head of lettuce everywhere shouting HEADS UP and trying to get us to play catch with her. i'm scared.
I joked that if anyone could fuck a 35 year old woman while wearing head bands and arm sweat bands it's you and look what happens.
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
the gays at disneyland are vicious
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
Going to be a long day. text me later. Sorry I puked in your sink.
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
No one will ever find true happiness until they have gotten stoned and taken off the bra they've been wearing all day.
You, my dear friend, are a poet of the deep mental longings of women worldwide.
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
If I die tonight, you and your brother can split my money evenly for college only.
all $38?
Randomize