I think my vagina is haunted
oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
He turned down a handjob. A HANDJOB. I know I'm no Jessica Simpson, but...
Actually, she's fat now, so...
Fuck. I AM Jessica Simpson.
Found a 10-can wizard staff hidden in our closet. Did we cut someone off?
That's yours. We cut you off.
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
I wasn't even hungover I was just mourning my dignity
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
Randomize
