Hey, It's Lauren. i wanted to talk to you tonight. I like you, as you know because kyle told you. I was wondering if you liked me too?
Are you in the third fucking grade? Check yes or no.
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
you know it takes a lot for me to use utensils conservatively
We have been pregaming the shutdown of the government since Tuesday. Send help, and some more liquor.
Yes I have a handle on life. A handle of Svedka.
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
looking at my texts from you makes me want to throw up in my pants
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
I just want to nap and funnel a bottle of wine in a cute dress
I refuse to plan drunken casual sex. Just think of the monster I'd create.
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?
Randomize
