in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
Everything went well, until I walked into his bedroom and there was a Ronald Reagan poster watching over his bed - creepy
proudest moment: just made a guy walk into a parked car with his mouth hanging open cause of the shirt im wearing.
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
Dude idk, apparently telling two drunk chicks 'that's whats up' after watching them lick eachother's face wasn't the compliment they were looking for. I mean I was fucking hammered.
Wow.
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
We got the possum out of our house. We built a maze with our empty kegs and chased it with brooms.
I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
I should've realized you were drunk when you began to point at my crotch while yelling "Funland!!!"
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
Just saw the mall santa roll by on a rascal scooter holding a chic-fil-a milkshake and stop to chat up trio of cute 20-somethings. New hero.
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
Apparently you can unlock an iPad by doing a line on the lock screen I'm about to bust that myth
his penis was like the majestic horn of a unicorn and I came like a million trumpeting rainbows.
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