Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
just won a stolen shopping cart in a dance off in a parking lot.
Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
He came on my face and tried to draw out a smiley face because he said I looked like I had a bad day
you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
Through drunken recall, I have managed to bring back awful memories of losing my virginity. And possibly traumatized my niece trying to get her to "learn from my mistakes".
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
The venue for the new years party is close to the hospital for obvious reasons.
Just watched an entire Mariachi band walk of shame home together. Halloween at its finest
BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON
It doesn't feel like real life when you open your hotel room door and the first person you see is wearing a rabbit costume. I'm too hungover for this.
When someone's woman crush wednesday is an ultrasound of her unborn daughter...
I can't
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
Randomize
