You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
Everything was going good until she wanted to update her status...You forgot to close pterodactyl porn from this morning. Clothes went back on.
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
Thanks for not stopping me when I decided to call my mom at 2 in the morning to ask her where I was born
You were screaming across the bar "BUYING US SHOTS ISN'T GOING TO MAKE US STRAIGHT, YA KNOW!!!!!!!!"
nobody understands how my tooth became embedded in the ceiling last night.
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
No more house parties. We're almost fucking 30 years old and I slept until 6 pm.
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
Don’t drink the Bloody Mary - it’s vodka and salsa.
Randomize
