yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
you started looking at my couch laughing and saying to it "she thinks I'm talking to you" then proceeded to laugh and talk to the couch some more.
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
Who had my phone last night? Whoever it was sent "Fuck you, you're adopted" to half the people on my contact list.
You were just so carefree! People were like, "there's broken glass everywhere" and you were just like, IDGAFFFFFFF
There is a 97.5% chance that my sketchy roommate is also a hooker.
So when can I meet her?
how does spending your day off taking me to the hospital sound?
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
The awkward moment when a lady ask you what kind of lipliner you're using, but really I have just finished eating hot cheetos.
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
Don't do tequila. The Devil himself spits into shot glasses and we call it tequila. You will do bad things.
You lost to your mom AND grandma in beer pong last night. pretty sure that constitutes a retirement from the sport
Randomize
