Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
I looked her in the eye and told her I was 'balls deep' in love with her...She said that wasn't saying much. Time to drink away the sadness...
There is a pube in my fucking eyeball
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
I see myself subsisting on tequila for the next several days.
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
I trusted a fart in Toronto. NEVER TRUST A FART IN TORONTO.
Right. He was like "I'll be here all night if I have to..." I was like "Well then, I'll have to call the cops..."
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
Randomize
