life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
I woke up to the sound of a beer can being opened. I love him already
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
You wouldnt be able to explain the can of green beans in my mailbox, would you?
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
for a while, i completely forgot that you wrote "fuck me" on my stomach before we went out. when he took my shirt off that night, he just looked down and said, "may i?". i think i'm in love
I was having trouble getting it up so she grabbed it and said "no, it's too big to fail"
When you are 21 it's acceptable to run out of the tavern and puke all over the bike rack... when you are 35 it's called alcoholism.
People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
Pretty sure I love my nipple piercing more than I'll love my children someday
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
Randomize
