I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
Moral of the story: If you're gonna throw a glass of wine in a guy's face, don't do it in your own kitchen.
I keep having to have that awkward "I don't want to have sex with you" convo. I thought wearing sweatpants was suppose to prevent this situation..
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
I need to stop getting picked up at 3 am by my friends parents. This is the second time this week. I'm a grown man.
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
What the fuck happened last night.... I woke up with a bowl half full of ravioli next to my head, reversed on my bed still fully clothed.....
I just apologized to a wet floor sign i walked into.
I text the word "masturbation" so much, all it only takes my iPhone to auto-spell it is for me to type "mas".
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
Randomize
