butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
i want two things in life...emily to stop talking and a block of cheese.
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
Got kicked out of the baseball game with a 4 officer escort. Not bad for a monday night.
woke up with the bag of wine duct taped to my shoulder.
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
im starting to recognize places in this city by where i have drunkenly peed in public
You played Frank Sinatra today after we had sex. You moved way up in my literal book of men. Congrats.
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
So far in 2016 I told someone id give them a blowjob for lasagna.
My favorite part was when you kept telling everyone you were being "green" by drinking straight out of the bottle so u weren't wasting a cup.
Sooo, my mother is snoring, my ex is sexting me, the guy I'm having an affair with is sending me dick pics, and all I want to do is sleep!
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
Randomize