So ps i'm not pregnant with any athletes illegitimate children : )
he asked me to marry him on one of those scrolling message belt buckels.... what now?
It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
She touched you, you're now contaminated for 48 hours. Please watch out for rashes, hives and STDs as she's known to have all three.
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
I really super glued a paper bow tie to my body last night. I need to do less drugs.
Apparently "he pulled out..mostly" is not a valid reason for thinking there's no way i can be pregnant to the nurses at the student health center.
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea?
There're making snowcones with the leftover vodka from last night. This is not the time to be making up excuses!
Yeah bro I don't know how she's gonna explain the black eye, how else do you tell your boss "my knee hit me in the face during sex last night"
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
In honor of the new administration, I'm going to make it my goal this weekend to get some lesbian action. Fuck Donald Trump and fuck Mike Pence. I'm going to be a spiteful gay.
Randomize
