Whod you bang
exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
I just had an epiphany. There is NOTHING TO STOP ME from making cake mix and eating it all instead of making a cake. It feels like my entire life has peaked at this moment.
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
Hi. I probably already told you this mid puke, but thanks again for babysitting me last night. How did I get in the car?
I think I'm just gonna be a cat and wear slutty black clothes with some eyeliner on my face and pretend my ears got stolen by a drunk guy
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
If a raisin and a desert had a bastard child that would be the inside of my mouth right now
That tampon felt like a stick in my vagina, I am never making a drunken tampon choice again. Friends don't let friends choose tampons drunk.
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
I now have a "weirdest thing a guy ever did in bed" story. Cut my fingernails.
Yeah I'm gonna need you to stop it right there.I know this is supposed to be a safe space but Imma have to exit.
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
That awkward moment when you realize you've been secretly blackout dating someone for three months. Drunk me is in a committed relationship.
Randomize
