Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
I bought a Christmas tree in my drunken state last night, after walking a half mile in search of vino and prior to my apparently playing boardgames with my boyfriend's family. There is no way you are on my level.
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
HOW DO YOU FORGET TO FINISH WINE
I saw an episode of cops that had one of my ex husbands on it.
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
I did a trust fall off the bar and then almost got into a knife fight over a push up competition. Just another Tuesday.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
So. My mom went grocery shopping for me while I was at work & brought the food here. Cool bc my dildo was laying on the counter. Forgot I left it out. I am sure she saw. Im mortified.
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
Randomize
