and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
worst morning ever. completed my walk of shame home to find my parents, grandma, and priest had come down to surprise me on my birthday. now i'm in the car with them to go get my car from the bar.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
Just got tipped $5 for distracting some dude's gf while he got another girl's number. Bro-code at its finest.
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
Don't blame me. I told you I didn't know if I had a key to those hancuffs.
Nope we are at the ER my brothers crazyass neighbor kinda stabbed him in the neck. He's gonna be fine.
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
He passed away peacefully doing what he loved to do best. Eating a pound of vodka gummy worms and failing at sex and the city trivia.
But we made up last night and had unbelievably crazy sex tonight. I legit went blind for like 15mins from him choking me. It was awesome
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
Randomize
