we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
so i just saw your dad embarking upon a biking journey in full reflective gear
...this stays between you and me
Im drinkin out of a coconut! I think im gonna dip my balls in it!
Just found out my mom tried to sue the birth control company when she got pregnant with me...love you too mom.
two fat guys on crotch rockets just invited me to 'party' with them at a del taco. why does this keep happening to me?
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
Ps, did you know if you google "drunk jenga", you're the first image that shows up?
1. Sorry about making it snow. 2. If it left a mess, I will be over to clean it. 3. Can that fire extinguisher still be used? If not, I'll buy a new one. 4. I just wanted to make it snow!
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
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