need another drink. this is the easiest way
i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
he breathalyzed me before we had sex.
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
I JUST WOKE UP WITH MY UBER DRIVER
All I ever wanted was my bed, Tylenol, and total darkness. Instead I had a pervert with porno posters who blares german rock calling me tootsie pop. How was your saturday night?
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
i was watching the elves fighting on my knees while waiting for the shrooms to kick in then i realized
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