Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
I want my own midget army. I think I would be a good midget army leader.
He was dressed up as Jesus and had vodka in one hand while he was blessing everyone and splashing them with holy water in the bathroom.
i'm almost positive she was a dude but like it doesn't even matter
re read what you just said
The cop asked you after the breathalyzer what you think you blew and you very discreetly shouted "I'm pretty sure i blew Kyle on the way here "
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
At the funeral we'll say nice things, like "She was delightfully extreme, psychotically wonderful, and could probably drink all you fuckers under the table."
That's literally the perfect eulogy
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
I'M IN A SPINNING VORTEX OF SELF-HATRED AND HORNINESS
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
Your mom has reinvented the use of a ping pong ball.
Randomize
