nut hugger
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
There's a very real possibility that I'll wake up in your uncle's driveway.
I have come to realize that my purpose in life is less musical and more as a filter of alcohol into water.
It's a low moment when you're looking at your girlfriends tits on your daughter's phone..
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
Whenever you're sad about your life, just remember that I'm on a first name basis with the late night taco bell drive-thru workers.
If your find a 12 pack on your doorstep consider it a gentleman's agreement to never speak of that night again
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
I woke up to some strange woman rubbing peanut butter on my thighs
Sorry for trying to baptize you last night
You knew the entire thing in Latin I was so impressed
Damn, I just did coke with a dude in a bathroom and after he took his dick out right in front of me and took a piss. What a power move.
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
Randomize
