Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
call me tomorrow and ask me about coke-whore stripper. It hasnt happened yet, but im sure it will be plenty disappointing.
did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
I woke up at 4am on the couch with half my clothes on. And by half my clothes I mean my earrings.
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
You need to let me be on top sometimes. I gotta get rid of these love handles
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
There are so many birds around me. And squirrels. I feel like that chick from Enchanted...but like if she had a dick and made poor life decisions.
Come to wine Wednesday bro. We have a fog machine
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
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