No, he's fine. He only wanted to know why there were traffic pylons in the living room and how the peanut butter got on the ceiling.
Just realized how many men I've had sex with for the first time in St. Patty's Day past. Currently sending "HAPPY SEXIVERSARY" texts...
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
he tried breathing fire using moonshine and a roman candle. would not have believed it unless i actually witnessed it.
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
I just want somewhere where I can sit down, without changing my clothes, that will serve me breakfast food and booze. Is that too much to ask?
Am I the only one who saw the used condom in the driveway this morning
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
We fucked while The Odyssey played in the background. Homer would be proud.
I hope Trump leaves Planned Parenthood alone for at least another month. The week got away from me. #whorelando
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