I have a cup of vodka in my bathroom with a straw in it. Yes, I am ready for this bikini wax.
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
Let us ponder on the good times. Ya know when the Jonas brothers were incapable of growing facial hair and I didn't fully understand what a dick looks like
She's relieving herself in the laundry room. I'm really hoping there's a toilet in there...
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
Also my roomate used some of my condoms so she gave me her hummus. Great trade
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
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