if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
i think that dennys waitress has my boxers
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
Check your mailbox. I left a "sorry I didn't have time to suck your dick today" consolation gift.
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
Watching the series finale of Friends and crying in my Thai food. I don't like hangover Jared.
my liver is dry heaving
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
Just saw 4 of my students at Denny's at 4am on a Tuesday. We all pretended not to see each other, as we are all clearly tipsy and/or stoned. Class is in less than 4 hours. Either i'm getting too old for this shit or they're starting on the road to crazy-town much earlier these days.
Randomize
