you know you should just kill yourself when you are helping your 16 year-old sister get ready for a date and you're going out to dinner with you parents..
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
He's trying to get everyone in the bathtub for a team meeting about how we're gonna find his car. Which is parked outside. Think we should cut him off?
His morals are debatable, but his heart or perhaps his penis is in the right place.
His penis is crooked. Right place? Maybe he starts there, but then he slants.
You just kept yelling and saying, "IM NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNTIL YOU TAKE THAT SHOT"
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
I'M CUDDLING WITH MY CAT AND THAT GUY SENT ME A DICK PIC. UNANNOUNCED DICK PICS ARE TERRIFYING AND MY CAT WILL NEVER BE THE SAME
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
you are singlehandedly the most cursed object the universe ever conceived
We need to stop calling him that. I definitely said “Fuck me harder Swizzle Dick“ while we were doing it and it got weird
He should appreciate that I recommend that corkscrew cock of his! I’m getting him laid
Randomize