who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
i feel like the prize bull at the rodeo. everybody got a ride, no one lasted more than 8 seconds and i'm pretty sure i kicked one of them in the ball sack
Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
I'm watching tv and he's trying to stick a vibrator in my ass
The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
I'm about to punish you for sending me a Snapchat of your boyfriend's morning wood
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.
You slid down a wall, tried to pull your cast off and yelled that casts were too conformist.
when a dude sends me an unwanted dick pic I just send him a picture of a nicer one. A more photogenic one. A dick with a future.
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
Randomize
