apparently went to arby's at 2:30am banging on the windows for someone to make me a "beefy"
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
My drug dealer just made me a sandwich at the local deli. Starting to question his street cred.
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
I was lying there too hungover to move when my dog jumped onto my bed and set half a calzone on my pillow. Best. Dog. Ever.
Picking up hoes with my dad is going to make it a little harder, but ay, if thats how he wants to bond after 23 years, Ill give it a shot
I dont care how drunk you were. Making a bet with MY husband at MY wedding that you could seal the deal before he could is ALWAYS inappropriate!
You kept yelling "NO CAPES" at me for no apparent reason
Oh man
I hooked up with the lead singer of the band at the wedding. I am so hungover.
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
My manager caught me going taking a nap in an empty room. Apparently she sleeps there too.
No we didn't talk. I was high and doing naked yoga in the living room when she walked in so it was just awkward. I didn't even know my dad had a girlfriend.
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