The shirt is mine, the pants are mine, the bra not so much
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
Does slim fast make a chocolate heart for valentines? If so that's what she's getting.
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
In other words, he somehow found his way to my apartment, wasted, and was naked on my new couch. Completely naked. It was too special to pass up.
The entire defensive line took care if me when I passed out. One of them even held my hair when I puked and the other carried me upstairs to bed. God I love football so much more now
Too bad they don't have an emoji symbol for condoms and 99 cent tacos
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
driving home hungover today was like a life test..it was like the goblet of fire
we watched a guy take a shot of tequila while riding a unicycle
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
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